Farewell and Goodnight
by Cirrus The One And Only
Summary: Will Ryouga ever find it in him to confess his secrets to Akane? **Completed, by the way!**
1. Farewell

*Farewell and Goodnight*  
  
Ryouga was well acquainted with moonlight-it was his flashlight when he traveled at night, it was a good listener, and it had a curiously wonderful way of making everything it touched silver and beautiful. Ryouga was never truly alone when the moon was in the sky. He sat in a chair in the corner of Akane's room and looked out the window. The light from the late evening sky was brilliant that night. He imagined the way he looked then, a profile outlined in white.  
  
Ryouga shook his fist to hear the bell once again. He opened his hand and let it roll to his fingertips. The light hit it, and the silver shone. Ryouga fingered the frayed red ribbon that was tied to the top of the bell. It held on by mere threads-the last threads of hope.  
  
Leaning back against the wall, Ryouga went over for the hundredth time the memories that came with the bell. Two years ago. Christmas. Akane, a simple child compared to the young woman she was now, giggling and holding the ribbon out to Ryouga. Ryouga scampering around the family Christmas tree to delight her. Warm girl's hands on his neck, untying his signature bandanna and replacing it with his Christmas present of a red ribbon and bell collar. Shining eyes. Love. The sweet music of two tin balls colliding. The day Ryouga almost forgot how miserable he was.  
  
He heard the laughter in the hall outside her door now, but did not move. He kept his face in the shadows, but the bell stayed in the light.  
  
The door opened, and in stumbled Akane, trailed by her fiancée Ranma. The two were giggling, drunk on love. Neither of them noticed Ryouga watching from the corner. They kissed, pulled at each other, and broke up the heavy moments with whispers, which led to more giggling. Ryouga felt like his body was being squeezed into a very tight space, but without him shrinking a size. He lifted his eyebrows to make his eyes feel more closed. The happy couple's voices echoed like screams in his ears. There was no worse of a torture than this.  
  
"Ryouga!" Akane's cry was half startled, half embarrassed. Ranma fell off the bed and onto the floor. Ryouga opened his eyes and managed to make the only sound his throbbing vocal cords would let him.  
  
"Hi."  
  
Akane sat up, re-zipping her dress up the back. Her face was the same color as Ranma's trademark Chinese red shirt, which Ryouga saw was busy running out the door. Akane smoothed her hair, which had grown out to shoulder length, and tried to think up something to say. All she could think of was:  
  
"It's been a while since I saw you last, huh? We never gave up hope that you wouldn't find your way back here!"  
  
Silence.  
  
Ryouga certainly wasn't going to be the one for small talk.  
  
"Well, I guess someone had to find out about us eventually. I just wish it had been a little longer. Given us some time to ourselves."  
  
Ryouga looked out the window, silent as stone. Moonlight, hear my prayer. Give me strength.  
  
Akane stood up and moved toward him. He already occupied her chair-she sat at his feet and looked up at him. Beautiful brown eyes she had. They were huge.  
  
"Ryouga what are you doing here? I mean, my room of all places?"  
  
"I have to tell you something."  
  
"Tell me something?"  
  
Ryouga nodded. He looked back out the window.  
  
"What's that in your hand?" She asked him, her face back to it's normal lovely color. She almost didn't want to hear what Ryouga wanted to tell her. The night had been going too well.  
  
Slowly, as if they were stiff and numb with frost, Ryouga peeled back his fingers to reveal the silver bell. It had been smashed from a full moon to a thick half moon, by the pressure of his clenched fist. 


	2. Goodnight

"Ryouga, how did you get this bell? You know it was the last thing I saw P- chan wearing before he disappeared. He's been gone for.so long now."  
  
"Two years, Akane. It's been two years."  
  
"Yes. And it's.it's crushed! Oh.oh no Ryouga, don't tell me--"  
  
Her beautiful brown eyes were filled with tears. Ryouga automatically put out his arms, and she wept silently for a moment into his shoulder. His own tears were building, but would break much later, at a much more private time. For now, Ryouga just put his hand to her back.  
  
"Was it bad when you found him?" She asked, pulling away and sliding back to the floor. She sniffed a little.  
  
Ryouga thought about how easy of an escape this was, Akane being fooled to think that P-chan was dead and that being all he wanted to tell her. He could fill her head with stories of finding the pig by the highway, or by a train track. He could tell her that her pet had passed instantly, without much pain, and she would smile again and have forgotten about the pig by next month.  
  
No, Hibiki. That's not the way. She must know the truth.  
  
"It's not what you think, Akane. P-chan lives."  
  
Akane looked up suddenly, her mouth open in a silent gasp.  
  
"He lives in me."  
  
Her face was astonishing. It was blank a moment, then as she heard his words again her lips closed, her eyebrows went down and her eyes went to the side. Grasping the true meaning of what he had told her, Akane's eyes again flew open and her hand was raised to her mouth. Ryouga stood up.  
  
"I will no longer shame your house with my cowardice. Farewell, my Akane. I wish you great happiness--".  
  
He could say no more, and began to walk. On shaky knees, out of her room, down the hall, down the stairs, through the living room, and out the door into the street. He collapsed there, on his hands and knees, taking great breaths of air and letting the tears roll down his cheeks.  
  
When he had let everything out and could outburst no more, Ryouga stood up unsteadily to look back at the Tendo Dojo. Through the window, he could see Akane sitting in the chair he had just left, staring frozenly at the sky. She would get over it soon enough, Ryouga reasoned. After all, it was only the loss of a pet.  
  
Ryouga turned back and began his last journey out of Nerima, a city of old rivals and unrequited love. He had no idea where he was going, how he would get there, or where to stop when he found the right place, but he felt it was out there.  
  
This time the journey would be about him. No distractions, no 24 hour guilt, no hatred and desire for revenge against all of his old foes. Ryouga's shoulders bore no more burden.  
  
He discovered that he needed no cursed spring to make him a real man. All he needed was honesty.  
  
  
  
************************THE END************************* 


End file.
